But I'm not feeling all " !!!!! ". The end of the weekend is always a little bit of a let down time for me. Tonight I am sitting on my naked bed waiting for sheets to come out of the dryer. I can smell soap in the bathroom and I don't like the smell of this particular soap so I will probably go feed it to the garbage disposal soon but I'm almost too apathetic to do that. I'd almost rather sit and smell the bad smell.
I have no idea who Charles Dubois is but he said the following:
The important thing is this: To be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.
Can you tell I'm being all introspective and stuff? I so want to be the person that is living deliberately. I so want my life to matter. I so want to be the model for my girls to attain fulfillment and happiness in their adult lives. I so just want to laugh and laugh and laugh and know that I am loved enough so it overflows out of me and into everyone around me. I so do not want to sound like I'm in eighth grade, and I do, I know.
I laugh and blush when I think of the idealistic little twerp I used to be, but damn, I had big dreams back then- I was going to rule the world and eat ice cream and potato chips for breakfast every morning just because I could.
I just keep asking myself: What am I doing? What am I doing?